Forgetting

Today is Tuesday.  This week is my last "school week" in KobeYamate. Today I had my last Japanese class with みやけ先生.  Right now I want to cry.  It's almost over. This year, I've dreamed about all my life, is slowly coming to an end.  I've made incredible friends, and met so many people that I will never forget. I've had experiences, that will never live up to anything else in my life, and I know that I will slowly forget them all, all the fantasies about this year, the disappointment, the happiness, the sadness,the excitedness.  Everything, all those feelings, I soon will forget.  There is just one problem, I don't want to forget, I don't want to say good-bye, I don't want to hug my last hugs, I don't want to forget those moments.  Forget the moments when I had random people talk to me because I was foreign, falling asleep in class, being the 3rd fastest runner for a certain run, traveling all over Japan, the excitement, the moment of not knowing whats ahead but still accepting the future, the feeling of losing everything you had in your hands, the warm kiss of a stranger, making bad choices and learning from them.  All of those are special to me in some way, with some event in my exchange.  All of those feelings I will soon forget, I don't want to forget them, not at all,  I'm not read.  I wish they could last just a little bit longer.  The future is so unset for me that it is kind of scary, whether I'll still have feelings for certain people, friends,If I'll go to college, WHEN I'll go to college, What will I major in, Where I'll live, What I'll do, Who I'll marry, all of those questions all the way until, "When will I die?". All of these can change with one choice, starting right now.